Meet a Cremation Service Owner: Valerie Usery from Ascend Cremations
Valerie Usery is the Owner and Family Care Lead at Ascend Cremations, a direct cremation provider based in Mesa, Arizona. Valerie personally supports every family Ascend serves, overseeing each step of the process alongside licensed funeral director Savanna Miller.
Valerie, how long have you worked at Ascend Cremations? How did you first get into the profession?
Ascend Cremations is brand new — we just opened this year. But our journey into this work has been anything but sudden. Before starting Ascend, I managed a cremation business that supported local funeral homes behind the scenes. Most people don’t realize that many funeral homes outsource their cremation care — and we were the ones they trusted.
Those same funeral homes, now technically our competitors, have been incredibly supportive as we built Ascend. It means a lot.
This business is a family effort — it’s me, my husband, and my brother-in-law. My husband, a software engineer, built all our systems and infrastructure. There’s not a computer issue he can’t fix, and that means our families never experience downtime or digital frustrations. My brother-in-law brings over 20 years of experience running a funeral home. We all bring different strengths, but the mission is shared: compassionate, transparent care.
What is your job like? What are you responsible for in a typical week?
There’s a weekly rhythm, but no two families are the same — and that’s what makes this work so meaningful.
I spend my days connecting with families, learning about the person they’ve lost. I gently ask questions, listen to stories, and learn the little things — the funny quirks, the quiet tenderness, the legacy they leave behind.
Then comes the behind-the-scenes part: paperwork, permitting, coordination. It may sound routine, but for me, it feels like a privilege. I get to serve families during one of the hardest chapters of their lives. It’s an act of service I don’t take lightly.
What is your favorite part of your job?
It may sound unusual, but my favorite part is bringing someone’s loved one home.
That moment is deeply emotional — quiet, sacred, and full of meaning. It reminds me of a military homecoming, when the fallen are received with honor and reverence. I’m not front and center in those moments. I’m standing back, bearing witness, making sure everything is just right.
It’s the most humbling part of the work — returning someone to their family with dignity, care, and quiet respect.
What do you wish more people knew about funerals and cremation?
That it’s okay not to know what you need. That you can ask questions — even if you’re not sure what to ask.
My role is part guide, part concierge. Sometimes that means being present and active. Sometimes it means stepping back and giving space. I want families to know that whatever pace they need — I’m here for it.
Also: there’s no rush. The paperwork can wait a day. The service can happen later. There’s more room than people realize to create something meaningful on your terms.
At Ascend, we don’t believe in upselling during grief. We believe in transparent pricing, honest guidance, and trusting relationships.
What was the most memorable experience you’ve had supporting a family?
A dear friend of mine lost her oldest child — suddenly, and far away from home. The loss itself was heartbreaking. The logistics added another layer of overwhelm. We helped her navigate the out-of-state transport, but the moment that stays with me was when she asked to come with me to the airport.
Just the two of us. Quiet. Grieving. Bringing her son home.
That’s what this work is. Meeting people where they are. Giving space. Being present.
Do you have any thoughts or recommendations for people who are grieving?
Grief is personal. There’s no “right way” through it — and it never really goes away. It just changes shape.
Sometimes, you may need help beyond your circle. That’s not weakness — it’s wisdom. Therapy, support groups, even just reaching out to someone — all of it is valid.
I also want to say something to friends and extended family: your grief matters too. There’s often this unspoken hierarchy of who’s allowed to grieve “the most.” But loss touches everyone, and there’s room for all of it. It’s not a competition — it’s a shared expression of love.
Is there anything else you’d like to share with our audience?
The way we “funeral” is changing — and I think that’s beautiful. Some families want a traditional path. Others want something totally unique. I love both.
At Ascend, we built something new because we believe simplicity, compassion, and flexibility should be available to every family. If you ever have questions, even if you’re not ready to make arrangements, I’m here. Just reach out.
